The "I feel" message is a conflict resolution skill is taught to students at Purple Sage Elementary. An "I feel" message is used to tell someone how you feel about something they have done. However, it can certainly be used when you are happy about something as well. We also explain to students that just because an "I feel" message is used, it does not mean that they will get their way, but at least they have told the person how they feel.
Below are the steps to building and "I feel" message:
Building an "I feel" Message
I feel ______ (explain how it made you feel using a feeling word)
when ______. (tell the person exactly what they did)
I want ______. (say what you want from them)
Examples: "I feel mad when you don't listen to me. I want you to listen to me when I'm talking to you."
"I feel sad when you call me names. Please stop calling me names."